Don't you send me to vm
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
