That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize