And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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