Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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