I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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