Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Im just a social blackout drinker.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Randomize