yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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