I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
