so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
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