Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize