Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
