Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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