I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize