I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Randomize
