Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
