absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
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