I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
