I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Randomize
