This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
