I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
