In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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