Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
