just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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