woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Randomize
