brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
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