I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
