tell your sister to shave her snatch
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Randomize
