I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
