Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
