Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
My penis needs a shock collar
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
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