Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Randomize
