Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
