i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
His hands were made for my vagina.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
