stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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