I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
