remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
