I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
