Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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