we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
i came on her dog
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Randomize
