Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
