I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
