you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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