We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
