I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Randomize
