brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
