so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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