oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
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