We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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