Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Randomize
