he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
